A bit sad...

This is just another one of my random emotional spurts.. whatever it's called...

I hate having no time to slack off.

I adore Arashi very much. But since I haven't had the time to at least pause and catch up... What's new with them... How's everyone doing... What's up with them... those stuff that I used to know... I sorta lost that thing, whatever it was that fired me up... I know that I'm not yet done with Arashi. The fanaticism hasn't dwindled yet but I hate the fact that I can't do anything just yet!

I want so bad to be able to do the things that I've been doing before I got this busy! I'm glad though that everything's gonna end soon. And by the time I get to have more free time, I'm gonna spend each minute I have on them. lol.

It's quite weird to say that 'these people make me happy'. But it's so true! Watching them, listening to their songs makes me smile and laugh. Doing those things makes me worry free! Because I spend almost all my time gettin' creative on stuff I do for them, I feel like there's no room for problems in my life. And if that ain't haappy, I don't know what the word 'happy' means anymore. I mean if I can call doing those stuff my 'passion' then I'd call it that.

Oh!!!! And by the way.... I had a dream the other night. Nino was in it! I can't remember the whole dream. The only thing I remember is seeing him walk away. Was he speaking in Japanese? I can't remember. But I understood him. That's what matters right? He went to our place and dropped something off. I can't remember what. Then he was like "I won't leave til I see her" (That her is me. 'Twas my dream. Let me have this! ^^,) Then he was like "ok. So I'll go." but he didn't. He stood outside and waited. I opened my window and stuck my head out. I waved and smiled at him and he went "Okay! Gotta go!" then flashed me that deadly smile! Best dream! He killed me by doing that! haha... what a dream. At least I got one happy thing to keep me going for this month.

And I miss all of Johnny's talents. Maybe that's what makes me sadder.

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